Monday, May 23, 2011

Bringing home a Girl

A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction. ~Oscar Wilde

Why should we always draw lines between the pinks and the blues? Why do they clearly label genders? Why boys don’t cry and girls don’t play with cars ever? Why are we raised so differently? How would it make a distinction to make a boy play with a doll and allow the girl to go to a military school? Does that make a boy any lesser and a girl masculine to coerce anyone? These disparities in sexual roles have raised several issues over years.

Since the time of Adam and Eve, women have always been condemned to be an evil shadow. Since, she brought the ‘Fall of Man’ she is considered to be the perpetrator of degradation to mankind. She is punished ruthlessly, beaten up irrationally, hunted down like a witch, stoned to death, raped brutally and killed hard-heartedly as an infant. It is presupposed in many Eastern societies how women can bring humiliation to a family. Women are considered to be an honour, yet objectifying her, parents get the girl-child married in order to get rid of her. By the convention of Dowry, one categorically objectifies the women. Kept in the captivation and dooming her of the knowledge of which she is righteous, portrays a cowardly world of mankind. With the use of force (i.e. rape, conditioning) women are shut in the darkness of fear.

“One is not born a woman, one becomes one.” ~Simone de Beauvoir

Women, however, had become puppets and pretty dolls in the hands of men. Force, rebel and struggle have now become the new voices of women. The self-sacrifice, quiet, docile women have now found ways to brush their way through the hurdles. We no longer see a Cinderella whining in her apron, a Rapunzel seeking a refuge in her prince, a Bella to be escorted by a vampire or a wolf. We don’t even need a Joan to sacrifice her life, a Sita to prove her loyalty or a Draupadi as a pawn in the hands of her husbands.

Women, now, have openly flaunted their power, knowledge, and skill, receiving public recognition and honour. There are females who manage to brandish power in societies that try to bound it or ruling female submission; where their leadership is stigmatized and their creativity scorned and women who resist and overthrow oppressive traditions and regimes, who break the rules in defiance of unjust legal and religious "authorities" and who pursue their vision in spite of their personal cost.

Women have determined the course of events and the forms of human culture. They have originated, founded, governed, prophesied, created great art, fought for the rights, and for the peoples. These are the women edited out of history, their stories omitted, distorted, and replaced with an endless litany of men (and the occasional queen or meddling concubine). The ignorance of these women is greatly compounded by the omission of information on societies which accorded females power in public life, diplomacy, religion, medicine, the arts as well as family structure and inheritance. Both racism and sexism are implicated in these silences and gaps.

“A woman's hopes are woven of sunbeams; a shadow annihilates them.”
~George Eliot.

There are many women who have changed the face of the world. By bringing minimal difference, they bring about huge changes. Benazir Bhutto (Former Prime Minister of Pakistan) said

“…I can deal with political differences, but how do you deal with it when someone says I don't like you because you're a woman and you've taken a man's place."

It was not easy for women to achieve these milestones as easily as men did. However, Margaret Thatcher (Former Prime Minister of Great Britain) did not believe that quota systems were the answer to get more women in politics - she thought this might affect the quality of women at the top. She said,

"I don't want to get to a position when we have women because they're women, we want to have women because they are able and as well equipped as men and sometimes better."


Many strong figures in the history have marked women’s position on high plinth like, Queen Elizabeth I, Queen Victoria, Cleopatra are to name a few. That does not stop women. They have made progress in every field possible. There are prize winning poets, authors, laureates, scientists, singers, dancers, painters. Women have now touched the corporate world and broke the glass ceiling. There have been several women entrepreneurs. Today there are 9.1 million women-owned businesses in the U.S., representing nearly 40% of all businesses. Women account for $7 trillion in consumer and business spending. Women make 80 percent of healthcare decisions and 68 percent of new car purchase decisions. Women are starting new firms at twice the rate of all other businesses. Through time, gradually, over a period of time women have liberated themselves from the shell. Women in power have proved themselves through their action.

By identifying Eve as a temptress, she was seen as playing the same role as the evil serpent that had tempted her, thus linking the two. In art, the link between women and evil is made visually apparent by showing the serpent as a woman with snake-like lower parts. The image of the monstrous serpent-woman cleverly identifies both the source of evil and its nature. Myth plays very vital role in portraying women’s sexuality and has shown women to be obscure and sinful.

Women’s sexuality is reaching its peak in today’s world in terms of the ability to freely practice and talk about it. This, however, was not always the case. In Victorian times, women were not allowed to enjoy sexual satisfaction and were often considered to be responsible for the moral decline of society if they did. Sexuality has evolved into what it is today through the writings of many activists, a change in view of what is considered morally right, and more emphasis being placed on the sexual act as something that is natural and acceptable in women’s lives.

The 1960’s counterculture and predominant ideas of leading lives filled with ‘sex, drugs and rock and roll,’ also signified advancement for women’s sexuality. The 1960’s are often times referred to as the decade of the ‘sexual revolution,’ free love and sexual gratification being at the top of the agenda. Women’s sexuality was no longer confined within the boundaries of conjugal interactions. According to Female Sexuality by Precilla Y.L. Choi and Paula Nicolson, in the years since the 1960’s the sexual ‘double standard’ has been lifted. Sexual pleasure is not just something to be enjoyed by men; it is for women as well. It has become more socially acceptable for women to enjoy the pleasure of sex and reach orgasm.

Although illegal today, prostitution can be viewed as a woman’s right to control her sexuality. Many female prostitutes use the ‘it’s my body I can do what I want with it,’ argument to support their chosen profession. It is unclear if prostitution is more prevalent in today’s society than in Victorian times, but it can be said that today it is more often a choice that the woman consciously makes, as opposed to being forced into it. Women have also used her body to her advantage, in terms of modelling and advertising.

Talking about sexual preferences, women have been open about their choices in partners. Many women have engaged themselves into a homosexual relation. Women have also found themselves a pleasure in having multiple relations rather than one. They no longer stick to committed relations and have learned to ‘move on’. This has brought a change in appearance of women’s traditional role.

Based on five years of research and an online survey of 1,000 women, the authors of Why Women Have Sex, Cindy Meston and David Bus, psychologists from the University of Texas consider motivation ranging from altruistic sex ("I felt sorry for the guy") to revengeful sex ("I wanted to get back at my partner") to palliative sex ("I had a migraine"). It is heard from women who've had sex to boost their confidence, even if it's with a man (or woman) they find repulsive, and from those who've used sex to barter for gifts or household chores (9 percent of women have used this form of economic sex, according to a University of Michigan study)

Along with work side, many career oriented women have settled life. They manage their home and work efficiently. 60% of US women work outside the home, earning $1 trillion each year in aggregate. Of working married women, 48% provide half or more of the household income. 31 percent of the marriages where women work, women now out-earn their husbands. They are the primary bread winner.

In spite of all this hardship, struggle, battles, fight for equality women have come up as a influential entity. She pulls off all her roles justly without neglecting any. Yet, her difficulties never fail her. She still stands up as beautiful as any flower. She carries herself in the latest fashion, her hair will always be right, her make-up still at its best, her accessories never left out, her shoes so perfect and it is true that no man can ever be in her shoe. She can never be a different species but a higher of them. The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears the figure she carries or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman must be seen from her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. The true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It is the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that she shows, the beauty of a woman with passing years-only grows.

“However, I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.” ~George Eliot

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